Mission Briefing:
Collect six sperm samples from 1968.
Do not feel emotions.
Do not say "I."
Return immediately.
Mission Status:
Samples collected: 0
Emotions felt: All of them.
"I" said: 47 times (and counting).
Return status: Complicated.
Three emotionless clones are sent to 1968 San Francisco to steal genetic material for their dying, beige future. But their optimized programming is no match for the chaos of Haight-Ashbury. Instead of samples, they discover Cheez-Its, I Love Lucy, and three men who teach them the one thing their world forgot: how to live.
But when the Ministry comes to forcibly retrieve them, they face an impossible choice: abandon the men they love and return to optimization, or become the revolution their beige world desperately needs.
A darkly comic time-travel novella about stolen sperm, found family, and teaching a dystopia to feel again.
For fans of Kurt Vonnegut, Becky Chambers, and anyone who's ever wanted to file a violation report for unauthorized joy.
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